I was naughty today. I went to Borders and instead of buying 1 book with my discount voucher I bought 4. Ooops. But I scored (ok I paid for it) Stephen King's 'Under the Dome' which is about a town in Maine that gets a force field around it so no-one can get in and no-one can get out. I love shit like that. So it'll kind of be like The Stand (the epic good v evil novel) but a bit different. It's 877 pages and I can't wait to read it.

I've almost finished reading The Wolf which has to be the best book I've read all year. I absolutely love it and the best thing is that because it's a historical account I've actually learnt something about history which I crave. I cannot recommend this book enough. It is written exceptionally well and it's a joy to read despite the subject matter (German raider in WW1 that captures and sinks ships across 3 oceans, not to mention the ships it sunk through its mines on the sea bed).

Busy weekend. Getting my hair cut and coloured tomorrow. It will probably be a waste of time but I'm so sick of colouring it myself. Then footy. Night in and then Tim Burton Sunday with Rose.

So tired. So sick of this. I've got a little bit of chub back which is so awesome. My hip bones aren't sticking out as much and my back bone has flesh over it all nice and healthy. My arse is bigger and I have a lil sticky out tummy which makes me so happy. I have to get my bloods tested again in 2 weeks and I know they are going to be low despite increasing my levels. I really don't have anything to complain about as I have friends who have serious health issues that never complain at all. I am very grateful for what I do have in my life right now. This is just a hiccup.

I keep changing my mind about something every day. Sometimes I do and then I wake up and I don't want anybody, I just want to be alone. I think if it even presented itself or I had an opportunity I'd run for the hills scared shitless. As much as I (think I) want it it's my greatest fear. I don't know that I could ever let anyone love me (aside from my friends). It scares me too much. I should re-phrase that. I don't think I could allow myself to be loved by someone else.