Last night was ace. I had such a great time. It was so nice to bring some yummy snacks and dinner over and reciprocate the fine hospitality I had been bestowed with previously.

Unfortunately whilst driving home I felt the onset of sickness. Just like that! Today I woke up feeling crapola. My throat was so sore to swallow. Now at 8.37pm my head aches, my nose is becoming blocked on one side and the other side is slightly runny. My throat hurts still and I have to breathe through my mouth. Away with you sickness. I do not want you.

I wanted to hold my gaze longer but was scared so I looked away.

I dreamt of you the other morning. I kissed you and you reciprocated. It was a 3 time kiss and when you kissed back I felt a warmth move like liquid inside my chest. It felt so nice. It was only a dream and not reality.

I am totally enthralled with the book I am reading - Jasper Jones. I love it.

I'm excited yet nervous about footy. There is so much expectation.

I have really lovely people I work with.

I wish I could have made one of my dearest friends feel better today and take away her pain and heartache. I hate feeling so helpless when there is nothing I can do but just be there. Sometimes for me that isn't enough. I would take your pain and bear it myself, just to make you feel better.

My head hurts. I can't breathe properly. My back hurts. I'm hungry. But today was good.

I laughed hysterically to myself at the HOFF pictures I was looking at. And then was laughing stupidly at this guy's name I was sending a letter to. Oldham. Old Ham. He's an Old Ham. I thought it was hysterical. And that's all that matters.

Thank you for your random love. It means the most. It can be a defining moment in a day. Love to you. xox

I love the blossom trees. In the morning sun watching the pink petals fall delicately to the ground.


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Hungry, need to sleep.

Shit day I really hate my job. I'm getting mouthy again and I need to stop. I was in a mood of wanting to yell 'just eff off, just leave me alone'. I was feeling so narky I just wanted to pack it in.

Lunch with my old boss was really good. She thinks if I get a job with **** it wil be really good. She can't afford to pay me as her assistant on her own unfortunately

Looking forward to a quiet weekend. I just want to stay home and read my book. I need to clean up outside. I've got a dead tree to disassemble and lawn to mow. Oh the joys of mowing a wet lawn.

So many other things going through my mind that at the moment I wish I could turn it off. I




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I always feel guilty if I spend my money that I've earned. If I haven't saved a decent amount every month I feel like I'm failing myself. I bought these Friday.
I've just started reading Jasper jones. There are some things in life I can't get enough of- socks, jackets, books, music, underpants.













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As much as my friends and I are different in so many ways we are alike

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I think I just crashed.

I feel like I'm trying to cram all this stuff into my life and I keep thinking up crazy stuff to do. I need to stop thinking so recklessly and pull my fucking head in. It's like I feel I should be 10 steps ahead of myself even before I've taken a step.

Stupid. Just take a step back.

I'm frustrated,I'm sick of a certain situation and I just want things to be different but I don't know what that different is.

I have one line of thinking that I go along with and then BANG! all of a sudden my mind changes. I'm too confused and I'm too much contradictory.

I feel like I'm in a bodysuit that is not my own skin and I just need to shed it to get rid of this feeling I have. Just detach yourself from me so I can be me. I need to shed the skin that is holding me down but instead it's just weighing me down. Shaking it off is.... well it would be beneficial but then what do I do.

I can see it but it's just a fantasy. I'm so sick of my fucking reality. BORING!

I don't want to get older. Can I stay this age forever? I don't want to be younger but I don't want to get old.


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Hair cut and colour. Happy with the cut not so with the colour. It's meant to be a magenta. It's dull and still has blonde bits through it. Not happy. I need BRIGHT. So I'll be putting my own colour through it.

We lost today. It was hilarious watching those muppets jump up out of their seats when the siren rang. I said 'geez you'd think they just one the grand final the way they're carrying on'. Two other people said the same thing independently of me. Couldn't care less. It matters in September.

Quite concerned about how tired I'm feeling. It's 756pm and I'm exhausted and just want to sleep. I wake up exhausted like I haven't even slept. I'd be interested to know the difference in my levels from my last blood test to the one I'll be getting in 1-2 weeks.

Stupidly, I miss you. I'd love to just hear your voice. Yeah stupid thought I know. It's not going to happen. Ever. Shame.

I spooned with my dog this morning. I'm sure it sounds really wrong but it's really nice.

I'd like to get an old photograph of my grandmother tattooed on my arm. She would be horrified I'm sure but then again, she may like it. But then I found this picture of a girl with an indian headdress which I love and want. So I thought I could combine both and have my grandmother wearing the headdress. It reminds me of when I was about 8 in primary school and I had to dress up as a little indian girl and she made me this awesome costume out of brown curtain material, really soft too and given I had long dark brown hair I platted it in two and I also had a little headdress. I was a real little indian girl. It made me think of that. It was a really happy time. I loved that costume. I really loved my nanna. I hated my father for not telling my mother or myself she had been in the hospital for TWO WHOLE FUCKING WEEKS. That's two whole weeks I never got to see her, two whole weeks she had without me. She was my second mother and my friend. I only saw her once in the hospital before she passed away in 1996. I still regret that. I still miss her.